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What Your Lesbian Friend Is Actually Thinking (w/ Hannah Hart)
Donovan Sharpe Donovan is a sexist son of a bitch who objectifies women by keeping them on their toes, their backs, and their knees where they belong. Primetime with Donovan Sharpe. Add him on Facebook and follow him on Instagram. She has a pretty face, no visible tattoos or crazy body piercings, and could easily pass for an 8. She slides her card and begins pumping her gas. Being the stone cold assassin you are you immediately open her and strike up conversation. She seems kind and feminine so you number close her—successfully. Over the next day or so you run solid text game, and arrange a meet up. The two of you have a great time and agree to meet again that weekend. Sure, there are a few minor cracks here and there but nothing to be overly concerned about. What it could mean: This will describe the outlier situation. Odds are this will not be the case but there are always exceptions albeit very rare. What it probably means: This will describe the norm as it pertains to the typical western female. She has very interesting stories to tell which makes for great conversation. In the meantime she she makes her living by working in a daycare center. She went to a typical four year college and got a useless degree which she likely earned by cheating or fucking or both her way to a passing grade. She did, however, pass Sex Ed with flying colors, which was taught nightly at the Alpha Chi Alpha house classes at the Beta Phi Omega house were cancelled due to continuous false rape claims. She likes having sex with you and enjoys satisfying you. As soon as you lose frame or show the vulnerability she nags you to reveal, her legs will snap shut like a bear trap. She is capable of preparing proper, home cooked meals for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. On the flip side she just loves to surprise you with her gourmet hot dogs and oven baked fries. She occasionally pokes fun at you in a flirtatious way as an excuse to make physical contact with you or to get your attention. This is also a typical projection play. She wants a man who calls her on her bullshit and is unafraid to make fun of her so she assumes the role herself thinking this tact produces boners. She knows her value and understood that being too easy would misrepresent her. So she channeled her natural instincts and innocently played coy whilst simultaneously dropping hints that encouraged you to keep pursuing because a she liked you and b she, like all women, loves being pursued and subsequently taken. She likely chose you because the guys she responded to every 30 seconds fucked and chucked her and you were the only one still looking for a chair. She knows two things: You dominate her body, her mind, and her soul. You are her drug and she gladly compensates you handsomely, both sexually and financially, for your pharmaceutical-grade emotional roller coaster rides. She is a good girl—a high quality female with a low notch count two or less. The only reason she started ponying up the poon was because her FWB pipeline dried up and she needed validation. She is so grateful for these attributes she can only describe it with that magical four letter word. So there you have it. A few more hidden red flags for you to look out for when you make a girl your main chick. Do not get your hopes up if you think your girl has any of these faux attributes. Chances are, she falls under the probably category.
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